Michelle James Mediation | 01 October 2026
“How much child maintenance should I pay?” and “How much should I receive?” are often questions about fairness as much as figures. You may be concerned about whether the proposed amount will meet your child’s needs, or whether you can sustain the contribution being requested. With different incomes, separate households and expenses falling due at different times, it can be difficult to see how those concerns fit together.
In South Africa, there is no universal rule that child maintenance is a fixed percentage of a parent’s salary. The starting point is what the particular child reasonably needs for their support, followed by what each parent can contribute according to their respective means. The parents then need to work out how those contributions will be made in practice. That distinction matters: a parent’s share of the child’s costs is not necessarily the amount they must transfer to the other parent each month.
If you are trying to reach an agreement, the most useful first step is often to set aside the proposed figure for a moment and build a clearer picture of the child’s needs and both parents’ financial circumstances.
What does South African law consider?
Section 15 of the Maintenance Act 99 of 1998 describes the parents’ duty of support as a joint obligation. It covers the support a child reasonably requires for proper living and upbringing, including food, clothing, accommodation, medical care and education. When a maintenance court determines an amount, it considers the parents’ respective means and what is fair in all the circumstances. The duty applies whether the child’s parents were married or unmarried.
These principles give parents a framework, but they do not produce an automatic answer. A child’s needs differ according to their age, health, education and circumstances. Parents’ financial positions also differ. A discussion that looks only at one salary, or only at one parent’s list of expenses, may miss information needed to reach a workable arrangement.
Start with the child’s actual needs
Maintenance is more than a contribution toward groceries. A useful budget considers recurring costs such as accommodation, food, education, transport, clothing, medical care and appropriate childcare or activities. It should also make room for expenses that do not arrive monthly, such as uniforms, school supplies or an annual medical cost. Those can be estimated over a year and converted to a monthly amount for planning.
Separate expenses incurred specifically for the child from costs shared by the household. Where several people live in a rented home, the full rental amount does not represent one child’s accommodation cost. Equally, the child’s need for a home must be recognised in the budget.
Identify a reasonable share and explain the basis for it, applying the same care to shared groceries, utilities and transport. Some amounts will require an estimate; what matters is that the reasoning is clear and can be discussed.
| Type of expense | How to record it |
| Regular monthly cost | Record the monthly amount and supporting account. |
| Predictable annual cost | Divide the annual amount by 12 for planning. |
| Shared household cost | Record the child’s reasonable share and explain the basis. |
| Uncertain or exceptional cost | Identify it separately and note what still needs clarification. |
Where possible, work from school accounts, invoices, medical-aid contributions, receipts and recent spending rather than memory alone. If a figure is uncertain, mark it as an estimate. The Department of Justice also emphasises evidence of earnings and expenses in maintenance matters; an unsupported figure is harder for either parent to assess fairly. Department of Justice: Maintenance Courts
Then look at each parent’s means
Both parents’ financial circumstances matter. Income is part of that picture, but “means” should not be treated as a synonym for one payslip. Relevant resources, necessary living costs, existing responsibilities and the reliability of income may all need careful consideration. If someone is self-employed or their income changes from month to month, a single month may give a distorted impression.
Both parents need to provide accurate, relevant financial information. A proposed contribution needs a clear basis, and a concern about affordability needs to be understood through the same careful examination of income, resources and necessary expenses. Sharing financial information may feel uncomfortable, especially where trust has been strained. That discomfort deserves acknowledgement, but adequate information remains necessary for an informed discussion. Applying the same standard to both parents helps keep attention on the child’s support and the practical responsibilities each can meet.
It also helps to identify costs already paid directly. If one parent pays school fees or keeps the child on medical aid, that payment is part of the practical picture. It does not, by itself, answer every question about that parent’s overall contribution, but overlooking it can lead to double counting.
How can parents work out a starting point?
Once the child’s reasonable monthly needs and the parents’ means are clearer, a proportional comparison can help parents discuss their respective shares. It is a negotiating aid, not a statutory calculator or a guaranteed court outcome.
| Calculation | Parent A | Parent B |
| Monthly means assumed for this example | R30,000 | R20,000 |
| Share of combined R50,000 | 60% | 40% |
| Starting allocation of the child’s R9,000 needs | R5,400 | R3,600 |
Illustrative example: A child’s reasonable monthly needs total R9,000. Parent A’s monthly means are assumed to be R30,000 and Parent B’s R20,000.
Those numbers do not mean that Parent A must automatically transfer R5,400 to Parent B. Suppose Parent A already pays an agreed R2,000 school account directly. The parents still need to identify which costs each household meets, whether that school payment is already included in the R9,000 budget, and how any remaining contribution should be paid. They may also need to revisit the figures if a listed expense is unreasonable, information is incomplete or their actual circumstances differ from the simplified example. A maintenance court considers fairness in the circumstances; the illustration cannot predict an order.
Before comparing the final amounts, check whether you and the other parent are working from the same expenses and financial information. A difference in the proposed contribution may reflect a disagreement about the underlying figures. Identifying that difference gives you a specific issue to clarify before deciding how the costs should be shared.
Turn the numbers into a practical arrangement
A useful agreement needs more detail than “R___ maintenance per month.” It should make clear the monthly amount, payment date and method; who pays specified expenses directly; how medical costs, school costs and unusual expenses will be shared; and how the parents will exchange proof of payment or discuss a new expense. Clear terms can reduce later disputes about whether a payment was included in the monthly amount or was meant to be additional. Consider an expense likely to arise in your own family: if that bill arrived next month, would both parents understand who should pay it and what needs to happen next?
Some costs change as a child grows. An arrangement should be understandable now and contain a sensible way to review material changes in needs or financial circumstances. If there is already a maintenance order, parents should take care not to assume an informal conversation has changed its terms. The Department of Justice provides a process for applying to substitute or discharge an existing order. Department of Justice: Maintenance forms.
A five-step way to prepare your maintenance discussion
Preparation can begin before every figure is confirmed or every issue is agreed. Bringing together what you know, and identifying what still needs clarification, gives the discussion a more reliable foundation. The following five steps turn the principles above into a practical preparation process:
- Build the child’s budget. Record regular expenses and spread predictable annual costs across twelve months. Note which entries are confirmed and which are estimates.
- Collect supporting information. Gather school statements, medical costs, receipts and other records relevant to the figures you have listed.
- Set out the financial information needed from each parent. Prepare your own income, relevant resources, necessary expenditure and existing direct payments, and identify the corresponding information needed from the other parent. Mark outstanding information clearly rather than treating an assumption as a confirmed figure.
- Compare needs and means. Use a proportional calculation, if helpful, as the beginning of a discussion. Check whether it reflects the actual circumstances and whether costs have been counted twice.
- Agree how payments will work. Separate the monthly transfer from direct expenses, extra costs and a process for reviewing changes. Put the agreed terms in clear writing and consider appropriate legal review or formalisation.
Even if the parents do not agree immediately, this exercise can identify the point that needs attention. Perhaps the difference concerns the child’s transport cost, a parent’s income, the treatment of school fees or how to share an unexpected medical bill. Describing an amount as “too much” or “too little” communicates a concern, but it leaves the reason unresolved. Identifying the expense, assumption or financial constraint behind that concern gives both parents something concrete to examine.
What if you cannot agree?
Where it is appropriate and both parents are willing to participate, family mediation can offer a structured setting to examine the information, clarify disputed expenses and explore practical arrangements. A mediator helps facilitate the discussion; the mediator does not decide what either parent must pay or guarantee that an agreement will be reached. At Michelle James Mediation, the aim is for both parents to have sufficient information to participate meaningfully in the negotiation.
The Maintenance Court is also an important route. The Department of Justice explains that a maintenance officer can assist with an application. If the parents agree on an amount in that process, the agreement can be placed before a magistrate for an order; if they do not, the court can consider the evidence and determine an amount. Mediation should not be treated as a reason to delay an appropriate court application where support is urgently needed or an existing order needs enforcement. Department of Justice: Maintenance Courts.
Questions parents often ask
Is child maintenance always a percentage of income? No. South African law looks at the child’s reasonable needs, both parents’ respective means and what is fair in the circumstances. A proportional comparison may help organise a discussion, but no fixed percentage decides every case.
Does the parent with whom the child lives also have to contribute? Yes. Both parents have a joint duty of support. The way each contribution is made may differ, including meeting expenses directly in a household and making payments toward specific costs.
Does child maintenance automatically end at 18? No. The duty of support may continue while a child who has reached majority remains unable to support themselves. The terms of an existing order and the adult child’s circumstances should be considered carefully rather than assuming payments simply stop on a birthday. Department of Justice: Maintenance FAQ
What if a parent’s income or the child’s needs change? A significant change may require the arrangement to be reviewed. Where a court order exists, use the appropriate process to seek its substitution or discharge rather than unilaterally paying a different amount. Department of Justice: Maintenance forms.
Do we need to agree on every expense before asking for help? No. A list of agreed costs, disputed items and missing information can be a useful starting point for mediation or a maintenance enquiry.
A clearer place to begin
A fair maintenance discussion needs a clear picture of the child’s needs and both parents’ financial circumstances. A useful place to begin is to review your figures and identify which are supported, which are estimates and which still require information from the other parent. This may not settle the amount immediately, but it will show what needs to be clarified so that the next discussion can move towards a workable arrangement.
If you and the other parent are struggling to reach agreement, Michelle James Mediation can help you organise the issues and work through a structured maintenance discussion where mediation is suitable. You can contact Michelle at info@mjmediation.co.za to discuss the matter and the next step.
This article provides general educational information about South African child maintenance. It is not advice about a particular family’s legal rights or obligations. Individual circumstances and existing orders matter; independent legal advice may be appropriate.
